8/27/01

The Rock: “The Rock doesn’t care about the history of the WCW Title? Well The Rock knows damn well the history of the WCW Title. The Rock knows that the title traces back to Frank Gotch, Lou Thesz, Ricky Steamboat, and WHOOOOOOOO Ric Flair!”
[The Rock does the Ric Flair strut]
Jim Ross: “Little Nature Boy there.”
The Rock: “The Rock also knows damn well, what in recent years the WCW Title has come to…Diamond Dallas Page? Booker T? The guy from Scream 2, the dog from Married with Children, the maid from the Jeffersons! Shane McMahon, this title is just like your sister, everybody gets a turn!”

Edge: “Hold on a second Hugh Morrus. You know what? I think I have a better handle for you like Hugh Suck!” – King Edge to the former General Rection.

Jim Ross: “I, I, I,…ugh…I this is…I need a little Maalox. Maalox please! How about a little Pepto? JR needs Pepto!” – Jim Ross during the musical Austin tribute!

Jim Ross: “The Billion Dollar Princess just became the Dairy Queen!” – Jim Ross on Kurt Angle’s milk escapade!

William Regal: “Which part are you looking at about me?”
[Tajiri shows him the swimsuit picture]
William Regal: “Filthy swine, put it down you’ll go blind! What’s the matter with you?”

[Booker T. walks in]
William Regal: “What the bloody hell do you want?”
Booker T.: “You saw what happened man. The whole world saw it. The Rock stole something from me, the WCW Title. I want a rematch tonight. Can you dig that? Tonight!”
William Regal: “You seem to late sunshine, The Rock already successfully defended his WCW Championship tonight against Lance Storm. In fact, your quest for the WCW Championship has come up a little short!”
[Tajiri and Regal laugh]
Booker T.: “…I want to know what the hell is going on right now!”
William Regal: “You mean you don’t know? Well The Rock came to the ring and he had this little fellow with him he looked just like you and he had this little bow legs, he looked like a boomerang you could have stuffed a pig between them!”
[More interaction, match between Booker and Tajiri set up]

William Regal: “He’ll be along shortly, sucka!” – Commissioner Regal and Booker T having a “little” conversation!

8/16/01

Jericho walks up to Stephanie in the hall.

Jericho: “Ah, Stephanie, my very favorite person. Here we are, in Washington, DC, and you, without your cigar, how terrible. Speaking of terrible, it was terrible how the Rock both physically and verbally abused you and your brother Shane last Monday night on Raw. No one likes seeing you get put in your place more than Y2J.”

Stephanie: “Yeah, well the Rock’s gonna get put in his place, ’cause the Rock chose the wrong team. The Rock should be with the Alliance!”

Jericho: “What, what is that? What is that on your chin?”

Stephanie: “What? What are you talking about?” (puts hand on chin).

Jericho: “No amount of make-up can cover up that monstrosity! That’s a humongous zit!”

(Edge and Christian appear and come down the hall)

Jericho: “Edge, Christian, come here. You two enjoy a huge zit as much as the next guy. Look at the size of that one!”

Edge: “Total zittastrafy!”

Christian: “Huge squishy”

Jericho: “Not only are you a zit faced loser, there’s an arena full of Jerichoholics that think….”

Edge: (interrupts Jericho), “There’s an arena, full of EDGEHEADS, that think that you are nothing more than a…”

Christian: (interrupts Edge), “There’s an arena fun, of people, that are, like, totally cheering for Christian, that think that you are a filthy…”

Edge: “Dirty!”

Christian: “Disgusting!”

Edge: “Brutal!”

Christian: “Bottom-feeding!”

Edge: “Trash bag!”

(Jericho stops them both then says) “Trampasourous Rex!”

Stephanie: “I don’ t think you three understand. I own ECW, and the WCW/ECW Alliance is full of very powerful superstars who are going to make you pay, for what you just said to me, TONIGHT!”

Jericho: “Don’t worry, Steph, oxicute ‘em!”

8/13/01

Sean Stasiak: “Ahhhhh-” CLUNK “Doooh…” – The sound of an idiot running into a steel armor.

Chris Jericho: “At SummerSlam I’m going to take care of that smelly, greasy, nasty animal…and I’m going get you too Rhyno.” – First Stephanie insult of the night.

Chris Jericho: “I hear there’s an opening on the new A-Team Reunion special…maybe you should check that out Mr. T!” – First Booker T insult of the night.

The Rock: “The Rock could just imagine what you were like in High School! The oldest 27 year old senior the world has ever seen! Standing outside your house with your momma, and that short little yellow bus pulling up in front – beep beep, beep beep, beep beep! You just walk in on the bus, go into class, get inside the classroom, teacher up on the blackboard ‘Ok class, what is 2 + 2? Do you know Booker?’ ‘Oh yeah I know the answer to that, 2 + 2? Thomas Jefferson, sucka!” – Booker T insult number 2.

The Rock: “Booker T – hair done by Whoopie, Shane McMahon still a pussy!” – Booker insult number 3, Shane insult number one.

Chris Jericho: “You’ve got a man beast, and a hoe’s beast. I mean we’re dealing with the gore, and the whore!” – Rhyno insult number one, Stephanie insult number two.

The Rock: “This is a little rhyming contest between you and The Rock…well The Rock has got one better than that, here’s a little rhyme: Booker T and Shane – the punk ass sucka and the silver spoon motha fucka!” – Shane insult number 2 and Booker T insult number 4.

William Regal: “Well, actually he said the reason that you haven’t been on – been on RAW and Smackdown is because, well, X-Pac sucks!” – Commissioner Regal translating Tajiri’s words to X-Pac.

The Rock: “Who – in the blue hell – are you?”
Booker T: “Who am I? Who am I? I’m the WCW Champion, sucka!”
The Rock: “Just so The Rock understands this, you’re the WCW Champion Sucker? What’s more important, The Rock doesn’t believe he caught your name.”
Booker T: “What’s my name? Hell, my name is Booker-”
The Rock: “It doesn’t matter what your name is!” – The Rock giving his first promo back after making his movie and completely shutting down the verbal offense of Booker T.

Vince McMahon: “Show, show…right now I don’t give a damn if you call yourselves Double Trouble Crap on a stick, now excuse me!” – Vince McMahon to Big Show to get him out of his way of greeting The Rock.

Jim Ross: “It’s like manure in Oklahoma, you just spread it out and everything grows.” – Jim Ross’ thoughts on The Alliance spreading their word in the broadcast booth.

Steve Austin: “Last time I had three or four of those I crapped for three days straight!” – Austin telling Booker T the ramifications of Debra’s cookies!

Steve Austin: “Who is this guy?” – referring to Chris Kanyon coming up to him and saying that he was a huge fan.

Edge: “I pity the foo’ that goes through a table!” – Edge to Booker T on the origins of his name and their match later on in the night.

Trish Stratus: “Paddle this, bitch!” – Trish’s response to Torrie Wilson trying to seduce Jeff Hardy with a paddle.

Freddie Blassie: “Gentlemen, there comes a time when every man must fight for what he believes in – (Blassie stands up slowly from his wheelchair)…you understand? Now is the time! Get up. Stand up! And fight!”
WWF Lockerroom: “Fight! Fight! Fight!”
Freddie Blassie: “Yes!” – Freddie Blassie in a short, but extremely emotional speech on RAW to motivate the WWF Lockerroom against the WCW/ECW Invasion

Undertaker: “Make sure he takes his medication…”
Kane: “Freak.” – The Brothers of Destruction talking to Commissioner Regal about Tajiri…then Kane calling Tajiri a freak!

Edge: “Wow Billy! You sound like a human vaccuum cleaner, managing to both suck and blow at the same time! And Billy, since you’re not really doing anything lately, I was wondering if you could do me a favor. If in two years time at the King of the Ring I’m not defending a title or even in a match and my very special assignment is to go to WWF NY and eat a meatball sandwich, then please, just shoot me in the head! 1999 is SO two years ago, and it’s not my fault if you’ve done a big pile of nothing since then…and Commissioner, I vow to you that I will not ‘Billy Gunn’ this King of the Ring title because Billy, I plan on being entertaining.” – Edge before he called the 1999 King of the Ring “Billy Bitchface”…

Perry Saturn: “Thank you.”
William Regal: “You’re welcome.”
Perry Saturn: “You’re welcome.”
William Regal: “…Thank you…”
Perry Saturn (from down the hall): “You’re welcome.” – Saturn thanking Commissioner Regal for telling him that Test insists that doggies eat kumquats and NOT applesauce to save the ozone layer.

Paul Heyman: “You laugh like Elmer Fudd – Ah ah ah ah ah!” – Paul Heyman to Jim Ross in an Elmer Fudd voice.

Kurt Angle: “Justin, you know, if you say your last name immediately after your first name it actually sounds like just incredible?” – Kurt Angle’s quote to Justin Credible after the light bulb went on over his head!

Quote 1:
Perry Saturn: “British people fight dragons so they don’t get all fiery.”
Commissioner William Regal: “Yes, I suppose they do.”
Perry Saturn: “You’re welcome.” – Saturn in his psycho state to Commissioner Regal after Terri and Dean Malenko just got him Smackdown! off for the week.

Quote 2:
Steve Austin: “I hate the little snaggletoothed bastard.” – Stone Cold referring to Chris Benoit in his cage match on RAW.

Paul Heyman: “Verne Gagne is rolling over in his grave, and the man isn’t even dead yet!” – Heyman explaining what a wrestling legend thinks of Mick Foley being the special guest enforcer for the Austin -v- Jericho match.

Paul Heyman: “Terrible guitar player, no?” – Paul Heyman refering to Hulk Hogan playing guitar in the background of Vince McMahon dancing like fool at the 1987 Slammy Awards.

Shane McMahon: “C is also for cookie, which is good enough for me.” – Shane McMahon explaining what the “c” in WCW stands for.